For him, I’m grateful.

Monkey and I has always been quite different.

I've always looked up to him, admired him even, for so many reasons. I'd always tell him that he was doing so well, that he's amazing for what he was able to do. It's not just because he's my partner. I look up to him because he... he manages. He pushes through.

Monkey knows he has a hot temper - he knows he can be super stubborn, and it is difficult to change his mind about something once he sets his mind to it. He knows perfectly well that he has a huge ego, and he's so confident about certain things that it almost makes him straight-up cocky. His redeeming traits? Plenty.

Whereas I put aside my coursemates from university, my hobbies and my family members aside just so that I can put more effort in caring for him and loving him, he juggles everything - relationship, work, studies, his passion for car stuff, friends from different groups, and of course, his family.

He does it well - he puts aside time for whatever he needs to, sacrificing some sleep time here and there, some personal time to play a few League games, and a lot more. Still, he could manage. He works well under pressure. With several concerning events happening at the same time, he maintains his cool. He was able to manage other stuff that he needs to.

In situations where I would have gotten panic attacks or breakdowns, he was strong. Irritated, annoyed, perhaps pissed off, but he would be strong and he would push through.

He always did.

He has friends. Actual friends who would be there when he needs them to be. Friends who would drive over with a single notice, friends who carried his bag and went to his classroom with him when he was on crutches for several weeks. Friends who would, if he said he had a car crash, turn right up and help him with anything he needed.

I can't think of a single person in my life who can do that for me other than Monkey himself.

He goes the extra miles - not just a single extra mile that anyone could do. He offers to help further, requests to learn more even if there is going to be no pay involved. He sources for things he knows his friends needs, even if it could be troublesome. He looked out for me and gives me plenty of information - who this new person in his life is, why I shouldn't be too close with a particular person due to their background, what he's going to be busy doing the next weekend and who he'll be with, etc.

He does this all as if it's a 'should', as if it's a 'basic'.

Sometimes, things like this make me love him even more than I already do.

Monkey might not be very book-smart - I sometimes tease him about not being able to remember how to say certain weekdays in Malay because he's from an international school - but he's definitely street smart. He plans for the worst even if it sounds ridiculous to me sometimes because it seems like something super minor to me.

But that's how he made it so far. He can break down a plan to me, and tell me what would possibly happen if another scenario were to happen. He would let me know why a certain action would be a bad move, why I should go another route, etc. And it works. When I go to him for advice, it makes sense. Sometimes, I start to think that he's thinking wayyy too much into a simple scenario and I end up getting me onto the wrong route he warned me about.

Of course, 99% of the time these worst case scenarios never happen, but he sure was prepared for it.

He can be really, really lazy when he's with me. Once he's settled in my room, there's no dragging him out of it for nice meals outside, no bringing him out for window shopping, no going to the movies. He doesn't update the Torn City newsletter preferences that gets him free 250 energy because he was lazy to do the 5-click procedure, and he could get that amount of energy with an in-game item anyways, so he didn't bother.

But if we were to be eating together and I didn't want to eat a shrimp because I felt too lazy to peel it, he would do it for me. If I wanted to get a drink from the fridge downstairs but was already too comfortable to move, he would get right down and bring it to me. When my grandparents are visiting for the first time, he offered to meet them and provide transport where needed.

Like some other dudes that I know out there, he doesn't have a very high EQ either. There are times when conversations were tactless, and he gives advice when I'm just looking to rant. He would push solutions to me when all I needed was a listening ear and a few hugs and kisses before I gather myself back up. He doesn't understand why I can't control my mind to be strong enough to avoid panic attacks, and he definitely doesn't get hints.

I might tell him that we haven't been on a vacation together in a while, and he would jokingly mention the next car track meet, or tell me about a vacation with his family instead of talking about a plan for just the two of us.

Honestly? He's dense sometimes.

But when I tell him straight-up that all I want is for him to listen, to give me some comfort, or just to have some quiet, alone time with him, he would understand and comply. When my panic attack still hits regardless, he would be there to keep me company. When I get anxious in big crowds, he would be there to hold my hand and walk in front of me to shelter me from the crowd - even if he doesn't like the crowds either.

He would be the one to bring out the umbrella if the sky starts to turn a little dark when we head out and massage my back when it starts to ache just before my menstruation starts. When I wake up from nightmares of him leaving me, he's always a phone call away. It wouldn't matter if it was only 11pm or 4am in the morning - he would be there.

*sighs*

I'll end this post here. I need to let Monkey know that I love him so, so much.

The TurKey is going to be together for 3 years! :D

Let's see. Almost the third year in, and I simply can't imagine my life without this derpy little monkey in it any longer. It's still just as exciting whenever he pops over for a visit, and every night he stays over, a tiny little celebratory sparkler is still lighted up inside my heart.

Pretty much a huge chunk of this past year was spend in 100% comfort zone. Monkey would come over when he can after his internship hours (usually around 8pm or later) for dinner, and some days he brings me back to his place afters. He would take a shower, have his dinner (It's usually McD deliveries if it's at my place, or sometimes I'd fry him up some snacks), and we just derp from that point onwards. He'd be watching videos or playing games on his phone, and sometimes I watch with him. Other times, it's lots of massaging and scratching for him because he has the body of a 40-year-old man who keeps crying that he's going to die whenever I press his back for him 😂😂

We are supposed to head to Genting Highlands for our anniversary - I would love to keep our 2-year streak going - but at this point we aren't sure if his car is going to be out yet. Plus, he still has his internship, and his work ends around 7pm on Saturdays. By the time we are up, it'd be quite late, and we have to return around late afternoon on Sunday latest. Seems like we won't be going this year 😟

Genting isn't the same anymore either way; I suppose it isn't really that fun to go anymore. Even during our last visit when we were looking forward to visiting Redtail by Zouk at Sky Avenue - hoping that we will be able to play darts there as advertised - there were no dart machines and it was quite a cramped area. Monkey was disappointed and we just headed back shortly afters.

Frankly speaking I would still love to be up there - but just for the nice weather and ambience there. It would be just us (that's the best part!) - a short staycation where we can just head out and buy overpriced food later on and be back in the room cuddling, all nice and warm under the blankets 😌😌😌I suppose we'll have to miss it this year.

Definitely looking forward to our 3rd anniversary regardless - partly because 3 is my favourite number x'D Plus, this would be yet another excuse to meet up with him amidst all the busy schedules and working hours! 😝

So, we've been playing Torn for about 3 to 4 months now, I had a month worth of headstart against my man, but he caught up so fast and surpassed my level... Like he did in Clash of Clans and probably many other games to come if we were to play them together. He's really competitive in games after all, and I play much more casually with no intention of surpassing other people quickly. Just... chill, y'know?

Anyhoo.

Thought I'd record down some of my favourite memories with my man here to celebrate our supposed 'marriage'. It's only in-game k, this doesn't count in real-life scenarios. Will be waiting for him to pop the question, which is, in his words, "In my car, going through a corner, I shall ask". Meanwhile, these are 10 of awesome memories with my darling.

1. Him giving me a birthday 'surprise' which he made a little too obvious at Chateau Du Pain - he went downstairs pretending to meet his friend, and came up with slices of cake, and his gifts for me - 21 paper roses being one of them as well. He requested for our song to be played on the TV - 爱你. I took a short video of that moment, and he still had a bruise just above his lips from falling face-first at Jumpstreet shortly before 😂

2. We went to the zoo! His white shirt was almost reflective in the sunlight. We were laughing at a penguin that had its head stretched all the way to its back for some unknown reasons. It looked as if it had no head! The reptiles area was closed though.

3. He went to install his new exhausts. We were there much longer than expected, but the wait was worth it! He was so excited the whole way through, and when we drove back with the new exhaust system installed, it was just 👌👌👌👌 I can still see that happy little face right now.


4. We thought about that cute little waving lizard while we were looking at our new little baby gecko and we were both just sitting about 1m away from the lizard, waving in a slow circular motion at it hoping that it would wave back. A few seconds later he went, "We look like idiots" and stopped. xD

5. Early on in our relationship, probably just a little over a month after we got together, we signed 'Terms & Conditions' paper that we each wrote a copy of. It contained T&Cs like "We do not have serious talks about marriage at least until after being together for 3 or 5 years" - something like that. *scoffs* We aren't even together for 3 years yet and that topic has come up every once in a while now.

6. Okay, this isn't one of the best memories, but there was this little butterfly cleverly disguised like a fallen leaf at the window close to where we were standing at. I was giving him a hug when I saw it, and I told him, "I don't know if this is a butterfly or a leaf." He looked at it and told me it's most probably a leaf, and then proceeded to - keep in mind that I'm really scared of butterflies - try to grab it. It flew, and I got so scared I cried and he had to give me lots of hugs and pats afterwards 🦋🦋🦋

7. Our first vacation together was at Genting Highlands. Don't count in the parties with our friends or any other overnight stays. That first vacation made us feel so relaxed & free of responsibilities, and we were both just so focused on enjoying each other's presence. That was... bliss. 💕💕💕With both of us working now, that is a little more difficult, but we're looking forward to our next one!


8. I once drank a little too much wine at once, and my body started convulsing a little. That scared me a little, even when I knew I was drunk as hell. He let me rest against him and made me relax; he asked me to focus on my fingers - count one, two, three, four, five and repeat - until my mind was able to focus better and the convulsions went off. Of course I got a flick on my forehead for drinking to that extent, but his care made me feel so cared for 😊😊

9. Quite frequently, I get nightmares or bad dreams that he was going to leave me or tell me he hates me. One of the nights when that happened, he knew I was having a bad dream and comforted me when I confirmed with him that it was one of those dreams again. Without a second word he just hugged me close and repeatedly told me, "It's okay, I'm here." while patting me back to sleep. I slept like a baby afterwards.

10. Some weekends when I'm at his place, we would clean the house together. As a joke and part of our older memories, I told him to be careful not to break the mop when he was mopping the floor, and a while later he just came to me with the mop broken in half. I might have jinxed it xD

Oh yes, another of my absolute favourites - I was giving him a massage, and he was browsing through his phone. He showed me a video and after I commented on it and he replied... Well, merely 5 seconds later when I glanced up again he was already asleep with his phone slipping out of his hands. Does anyone else fall asleep so quickly? 😂😂😂

Well, here's to many more memories together with the best partner I could ever wish for! 💕💕

So, I have joined TornCity like... 51 days ago.

I was looking for a game that I can play in my office without it being too obvious that it is a game. The requirements:

• It gotta not look too much like a game
• I shouldn't need to stay for 2 minutes or 5 minutes for one game like most turn-based games
• It should be relatively low-maintenance
• It's gotta still be a game that I can play long-term

Lovely reminders from Torn y'alls.